Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Transitions


After 7 years of running the basketball snack bar, with this being my view for all the home games...I'm retiring.  For reals this time.  Next year I want to watch my boy (who will be a senior) play while I sit in the stands.

I'm putting this in writing as proof to myself.

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Two things.

The candied bacon and ricotta bruschetta was incredible

and

I am so making that palazzo punch for a garden party this year.

That guy that I like so much and I have been like ships passing in the night.  He's been working 7 days a week and while I know it's the season, I miss him.  A lot.  We did the completely geriatric thing and had a 5:15pm dinner at Maggiano's because it was all he had time for.

Lot's of young children and they removed the veal porterhouse from the menu...but still, it was a really great night.

PS,  We bring our own bottles of wine with us everywhere we go now.  

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Matteo...you need this.

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Winter in southern California means we pick and choose the days we get our cars washed.  

Should I tell you that I've been wearing flip flops?

Kyle came to share his news...he has a ship out date for Army basic training.  I love this boy like one of my own and I tried to hold it together but failed miserably.  I am SO proud of him...he is an incredible young man.  

This house that we live in is so very, very little but the number of boys that have passed through our front door...who have eaten at our table and hung out for hours on end?  Many.

We are so very, very blessed.


I'm a teary eyed mess lately.  I've got one boy with a big birthday coming up and I'm missing him.  I've got another who I'll share about soon..it's all good but the waiting process is hard.  I've got a 3rd who is looking at colleges but he's found one within 1 1/2 hrs of us that he is very interested in, so we need to go check that out.  

I guess it's just a transition stage for us and I'm needing to get out on my hiking trail and process through all of this stuff.  I don't do as well with things that are up in the air...I like to know what's what and then I'm good.  The unknowns and what if's are driving me crazy and I'm being called to trust...and I'm struggling with that.

=(



Friday, February 20, 2015

A Bunch Of Random Stuff


A month ago I was reunited with these cool cats; we spent hours upon hours sitting in this driveway when we were young.  Going back in time does funny things to you...it makes you remember where you came from and where you've been and what you've become and how very, very, very blessed of a life you've lived.

I used to sneak out of my house (next door) to sit on that driveway.  Pretty sure I could've just walk out the front door but what thrill is in that?

THIS DOG.

All snug in my bed the other night and I hear clanking from the kitchen.  Turns out he'll clean up any leftover food left on the counter while we're asleep.  

But seriously...how sweet is he?

(Don't ask that guy that I like so much...)

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My trail.  Yes, it's mine.  Soon to be switched out for another trail once the weather warms just a bit more because the creepy crawly snakes come out when the the temps go up...but until then?  It's mine.

Lets of deep thinking and praying going on out there and it's healing.  And hard.  And good.

Florida gave me the most glorious storm while I was there...thunder and lightening and my oh my.  This program is a bit of a thorn...and bit of a rose, if that makes sense but that storm helped ground me a bit.  Made me feel small at a time when I needed to be made small.

Yeah...I face timed my dog.  Well, I was face timing my houseful of boys and BuddytheDog got in on the action.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

THIS quesadilla.  Steak, black bean and fried plantains.

For reals.

Think they deliver from 2,500 miles away?

Airplanes over freeways.

Odd, yet kinda cool.

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A Valentine's gift from one of my boys girlfriends.

Sweet and cute.  

I have totally failed in the creativity department.

It's Friday and the I'm off to hike a few more miles.  There's a basketball snack bar to work tonight, so I've got a pot of soup ready to go to feed the family.  That guy that I like so much has a packed weekend but I've got pretty much nothing going on...and I can't wait.

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Thursday, February 19, 2015

Let's Catch Up


I'm going to be honest here and say that I haven't written for a long time because the words are too hard right now.  I have lots to say but it comes out all jumbled and crazy sounding and while I have been writing every day, I've been choosing to not hit publish.

I'm processing lots of stuff right now...some of it ugly and some of it good.

Life stuff, you know?

Anyway...let's catch up on some things.

1. The weather.  SoCal rocks, people.  Chilly and foggy and drizzly mornings become warm and sunny afternoons.  

2. Household stuff is at an all time high.  Laundry never ends.  Dishes never end.  The floors are always in need of a sweep.  The cabinets are in need of a clean out.  I'm in need of a wife.

3. Wild mushroom bruschetta.  No words.  No words at all.

4. Me and him.  He and I.  He's working like a crazy person (and now it's Lent) and I've been traveling and working like a crazy person.  We had a great lunch date at Disney a few weeks back where I talked non stop until his eyes got all glassy and he just stared at me.

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I'm missing him.  That's all.

5.  The champagne aisle is one of my favorites.  Just sayin'.  

6. When you haven't seen your loves in a long time and have 15 minutes to throw enough food on the table to feed 10 people, you punt.  Taco's (along with a large pot of rice to stretch it all out) to the rescue.  Win win.  No one went hungry and everyone got to make it their way...like at Burger King.

7. Speaking of Burger King, I used to work there.  Permed hair and all.

8. I spent 5 days in Florida where I was challenged professionally and felt like a dog that's  been kicked over and over and over.  It was rough and in the end, I flew home.  We have a contract, albeit a strange and interesting one and I did a very small victory dance once I got into my (business class, amen) airplane seat.

9. Crutches.  A staple in our life.  His torn hip flexor is reinjured and he can't bear any weight on that leg for 4-6 weeks.  Poor baby.  He's so gosh darned good natured about life in general...not quite sure where he came from.

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10.  Oh my.  Stop growing up, Brian.  Please.

So, that's pretty much it.  I'm working from home today and have plans for a long hike this afternoon followed by a roast chicken dinner.   The house is relatively quiet...two of my boys have had the flu and the coughing is beginning to subside.  Poor guys.

All in all though...we're good.  I'm needing to turn lots over to God to handle but my human self is holding on for dear life...not sure why I do that?  Probably because I'm human.

=0)


Friday, February 13, 2015

Winter Formal 2015


I've been traveling and just returned home...but before I left the youngest shrub in our little house on our little street went to Winter Formal.  Our school doesn't do a formal Homecoming so they throw in this dance at the end of the semester.

Pictures are always at the lake at the end of our street and the dance is held at Knott's Berry Farm.  Yeah...Knott's.  They get all dressed up and while the dance part is in their huge hall, the kids all spend most of their time riding roller coasters while dressed to the nines.

Strange?

Uh huh.

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Brian has a sweet girlfriend named Brianna.  Not to be confused with Matthew's sweet girlfriend who is named Brianne.  The good Lord knows I can't even remember my own childrens names, so why not give them all the same name?

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After pictures they boarded a party bus...basically we all pitch in and rent a huge limo bus to take them and bring them home.  Along the way they stop for dinner...this year?

In n Out.

Perfect for a bunch of basketball guys and their dates.



These guys have played ball together for a long time; it's fun to see them all together and dressed up.

This was our 11th winter formal.  11th.  It's all winding down here...one more and we'll be done.  Not sure how I'm feeling about that...it's such a fun ride that we're on.

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Monday, February 2, 2015

Do Overs


I woke up in the middle of the night last night and couldn't get back to sleep.  I did all the usuals...I read a bit, checked facebook (gulp), tried counting sheep.  Nothing worked so I finally climbed out of bed and went into the cold family room, cuddled under my favorite quilt and by the light of the fire had some quiet time.

My brain has been working overtime this week...the kind of overtime that I think is the work of Satan more than it is the work of God.

I've been thinking a lot about do over's and what if's.  What if I could back in time?  Would I do it the same way? Could I be better?  

And I remembered a part in the book of Esther...the part where she was soon to be called to save her people, to stand up for what she knew to be right even though it could have cost her her own life.  The part where Mordecai tells her that 'maybe this is why you were chosen to be queen.'

I absolutely love that part.  Esther needed a little nudge and he gave it to her.  Essentially he was telling her to step forward, do the right thing, act on your calling.

And...she did.  She did.

Which makes me think...have I acted on my calling?  Is this for what I was made?  

I'm pretty sure it was to be a wife and a mom...but have I done enough?  Did I play with them enough?  Laugh with them enough?  Love them, correct them, redirect them enough? 

I think so?  

But was I nudged to do things differently and then not listen?  Has He spoken (and I know he has) and I just dismissed it?  

Esther did do the right thing and because of her, that lineage that she helped save, has saved me.  

All because she listened.

Am I listening?

I've spent a lot of time out on my favorite hiking trail this week.  Brian and I had a deal...I'd hike a mile for every point he scores during his games.  Week one he scored 5 which is why I made the deal...I mean five miles in one week is more than doable.  Last week he scored 14 points (brat) and I'm ready put him up for adoption.

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But that quiet this week has been good.  I've needed it...needed to think and pray and listen.  I'll be honest, I haven't gotten any answers...just more questions.

So now it's another new week; a new beginning.  A time to start fresh.  A time to lace up my tennies and pray that kid of mine doesn't score a whole lot in his next game.

But more than that...it's a time to let God lead while I follow. Not always easy for this strong willed girl...but I'm trying.  One step at a time.


Wednesday, January 28, 2015

What I Did Yesterday


I stared at this all. day. long.  

Our attic stairs are broken (and stuck open) and I need a handyman (two, actually...it's a two person job) to come fix them and I can't find one (or two) and seriously, it's annoying.  The cats jump up there, the cold comes down, the boys hit their heads and I can't get to my dryer.

Want to know how I really feel?

=/

So I laced up my shoes and hit my favorite trail and decided to run out my frustrations.  That lasted for about 10 yards before I realized that I pretty much walk faster than I run.

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So I walked...and talked to a friend on the phone, and walked some more.  

The weather here this week?  

Sigh.  

Before I knew it I was rounding the last corner at mile 5 and I burst into tears.  This body might move slower than it used to, but it moves.  My brain moves a bit slower these days, too...but it works.  

However, the prayers that flow from my lips are 100 times faster than they were when I was younger.

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The big garden is being weeded today (thanks to one of my boys...Merry Christmas to me!) and I've got to get some winter veggies planted.  I've just spent the last 4 hours working on paperwork for work; looks like my afternoon will be spent much the same.

Now to find that handyman.  Soon.

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Settling Back Into Real Life


This weekend while I was away, I pretty much felt like I was in high school again...minus the big hair and the sneaking out and the boy crazy attitude.  Us girls talked and laughed and on the very last night stayed up until the very wee hours of the morning milking every minute out of our precious weekend.

And then I drove home and suddenly aged 30 years in a short 6 hour time period.  Back to work, back to laundry, back to males who were hungry and needing permission slips signed and reminders to study for finals.

From high school girl to middle aged mom.

And all day today, all I could think was 'thank you, Jesus.'  This life that I have been given...wow.  Is it perfect?  Nope.  Is it always easy?  Nope.  Is it without worry and frustration and broken attic stairs and ants and a dog who suddenly barks?  Nope.

But I am so very, very blessed.

In the midst of work today, I drove to my very favorite little Catholic church.  I like to pray in quiet places...in churches, sitting on wooden pews that smell slightly of Lysol and have a bit of a chill to them.  I'm not sure why...but I just do, and Catholic churches seem to always have the 'unlocked door' policy.

So I drove to my favorite little church and spent some quiet time.  I have a lot on my mind...a friend with an ill mom,  another with an ill brother, a son of mine who is struggling with the 'what to do next' syndrome, a parent in the hospital.   But there was much more today.  Praises.  So many, many praises.

This life is fleeting...and I realize that.  It's all just temporary.  But I have been given so much and I am so very, very thankful.

The weather this morning was so warm that I actually walked the dog barefoot.  Around noon the temperature seemed to drop and it began to sprinkle....all while the snow began dumping in other parts of the country.    I'd love a good snow storm right about now...a day to stay in and make a pot of soup and catch up on Gilmore Girls but sadly, that's not in the cards.

It's been kinda hard to come back to real life.  Real life means there are some things I need to take care of that I'd rather not, deal with some things I'd rather not...real life means being a grown up.

Putting on my big girl shoes now, ok?

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And part of being a grown up is dealing with what is going inside the four walls of my little house on my little street.  The issues in here have reached a boiling point...are you sitting down?

One of our two cats is peeing all over my sons bed.  Not sure which one it is but we are all at wits end...I mean, seriously, have you ever smelled cat pee????  It's happening over and over and over and we are all just about done.  Yes, the litter box is clean and yes, we try and keep his door closed and yes, we need to take them both to the vet to see what's what but if nothings up then it might be time for them to go live a happy life somewhere else.

For reals.

And our sweet, scaredy dog?  The boys taught him to bark (lovely) and he's been caught getting into the trash at night so I'm going to have to put a child lock on the cabinet door.

1,200 sq feet.  One husband.  Two large sons, plus a third who shows up now and then. Two (peeing) cats and one (barking) dog. 

Anyone got a partridge in a pear tree?  It's the only thing we're missing.

Happy Tuesday, y'all.  It's a new day....let's make it a good one.

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