Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Feeling Homesick

I've been trying to wrap my finger around the way I've been feeling lately and the only way I can describe it?  


I'm feeling homesick.  Or maybe it's just the end of summer blues...that antsy sort of feeling where it's just time to start a routine again, where being lazy just isn't cutting it anymore.  Or maybe it's the seeing of old friends this weekend and wondering if life is easier for all of them...if they came home to an overly lived in house with a squeaky couch and squeaky cabinets and a squeaky dryer?  

The picture below?  Italy, circa 1985.  Two young kids without a care in the world.  I can tell you,  without a doubt, that we were not thinking about a house with a mortgage or children moving away or birds eating all the figs from the tree.

I'm glad we weren't.


Part of it is the fact that I'm feeling disconnected from my real life.  I'm a big believer in the power of girlfriends...yet I haven't had that this summer.  There have been travels and jobs and health issues and I am just missing my circle.  Thankfully, real life begins next starts up, an established work day will begin, bible study followed by lunches out, and a son who I am tired of worrying about all the details of his move will be moved.  Right now it's a combination of worry and sadness...I'm ready for just the sadness.


I think, too, that I'm needing to reclaim my little house on my little street.  It's developed a sort of 'frat house' feeling in the last few months and this mama is done with that.  I'm thinking a little paint and a little shuffling of things from one room to another and a whole lotta retraining of boys on where to put their junk.

There's a girl who lives here...and it's time for them to be reminded of that.

Next week is the week...the week to clean.  Deep clean and organize and purge and file and sort through.  I'm emptying the freezer this week of all the remnants of meals past and starting fresh over, which basically means we are eating some pretty crazy things...but that's ok.  I'm looking forward to the outside freezer door full of homemade chicken stock and spaghetti gravy and  the inside freezer full of muffins and pancakes that the boys can grab and eat on their way out the door.

I'm ready for dinners that cook for long periods of time in the oven and make the house smell so good that everyone groans when they walk in the door.

I'm ready for my house to feel like home again.



  1. I am doing the same thing! Just waiting for it to get a little cooler here then I am going to start painting. Also, cleaning out and re-organizing and in the process of THAT, gathering stuff for a garage sale in October. Love it because I love the clean slate

  2. You two were soooo young in that Italy picture! Were you even as old as Matthew is now? Getting back into the routine is nice. I was exhausted last week with all the teacher inservices and final prep getting my classroom and first week materials ready. Now that we have had three days of school, I already feel like I am falling into a routine and leaving some of the craziness behind. The children who no longer live at home full time keep coming and going so it never gets too quiet around here, and one is planning to come home for a bit this weekend. I just wish it wasn't so dark when the alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m. and that it wasn't so dark after dinner. Even though it will be 95 tomorrow, fall is on its way!


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