Last week was one of those interesting weeks for me...kind of a surreal experience. I travelled to Michigan for work, to a town I used to live in, to start up a new program. Michigan, it turns out, has street corners just like here.
I have job security as long as there are crossing guards on street corners.
My old house is still there, still the same color, still in the same place but with a different street name. Things change, yet they don't...especially in smaller towns. I like that...I like that some things don't change. There is a familiarity that comes with that, a comfort, a feeling of peace.
I live in a place that seems to continually be changing, in a place where new is better, where if it's not broke, let's change it anyway. Not everything is like that, of course, but I just feel...unsettled lately. I can't quite pin point where those feelings are coming from, but I think it's because my role in life is changing.
I am struggling to find balance. I am still a wife. And a mom. But now I work...and actually have a job I really enjoy. I like the freedom of my work and I think I'm pretty good at what I do. But then I let doubt creep in...can I manage it all? Or will I fail miserably at it all?
So I'm trying...trying really hard to hold my head up and take a deep breath and point my face to heaven. I'm trying to trust that I am doing exactly what I should be doing.
Anyway, I really liked last week. I got to know my boss better and understand how things are run...but it's good to be home. It felt good to come home to a house that needed a good cleaning and to boys that missed me and a guy that I like so much who was excited to see me.
Job security on the home front.
This is yet another of life's transitions, I guess. If it's not one thing, it's another.
This weekend...this weekend was perfect. Lots of garden time with my family. Lots of cooking and laundry and picking up things that needed picking up. Lots of time to pray. Lots of time to just be...to not worry about what's supposed to be happening next.
I feel rested.
This week is busy...but not too busy. Work will take six hours of each day and the remainder will be spent doing the other stuff...boys stuff and wife stuff and house stuff. Meals are planned for the next week and I've got my hiking shoes laced up and ready to go...it's time to get back into the routine of exercising.
The other big change? My alarm is set for early...tomorrow morning I am going to make time for some quiet time before my day even begins. God's been waiting ever so patiently for me and tomorrow morning, I'm going to show up for Him.